Monday, October 23, 2006

"Tori!! You fat lard! Come get some dinner!"

Well, I am in training. (Cue "Gonna Fly Now" from Rocky) I am running in a Halloween 5K this weekend. So, I thought I should probably run some this week... I was doing really good on my treadmill, but moving kinda threw me off. So, I tried Turbo Jam. Um, ok... I can't dance. I am SO white it's not even funny. I should stick with the African Anteater Ritual. I think I'll be using my 30 Day Money back guarantee on that. Anyway- I feel like I'm in pretty good shape but running just is not my thing. Maybe running outside will be better than inside. I don't know. Sei also registered to run and said he'd "Stay with me." Gee. Thanks babe. He said it like he was doing me a favor. I wish I could say "Eat my dust!" and then be able to back up my words. But I can't. He hasn't worked out in months. Months! But he'll get out there on Saturday and run 3.2 miles like it was a walk in the park. I, on the otherhand, have been working out consistantly for years, all thru my most recent pregnancy and then resumed when Liv was 4 weeks old and just watch- I will be dying on Saturday. Why is that? It's bad enough that women have more cellulite than men just because we're women, but I mean, COME ON!! And I know women are suppose to be proud of our bodies because we're mothers and men can't give birth or be moms, but it's that gift that turns us into lards!! I took my smooth, flat belly for granted. Now I have a road map with rolling hills. I have cottage cheese thighs and a mattress butt. I have 5 children in my home to remind me I've grown babies and given birth. I have pictures and videos. I don't need stretch marks and droopy boobs as "reminders." And get this- I would LOVE to lose 10 pounds and Sei accidently loses them. He weighs one day and says, "Hmm. I lost 8 pounds. Weird." What the?!?!? How does he do that??? Not fair!!! Not fair!!! Not fair!!! Not fair!! Not fair!! Not fair!!! NOT FAIR!!!!! Yes- I just threw a tantrum. If you could see me right now I'm on the floor kicking my legs and flailing about.

7 comments:

Gina said...

Leg kicking and flailing is good exercise! Good luck in your run! I admire your strength... I still haven't worked out since Liam was born. I am the lard.

Thoroughly Mormon Millie said...

LOL, I was going to say, "That'll get rid of a few calories."

And I just used the "Tina" quote over on NCS' blog. Funny!

Yeah, couldn't we have gotten a better reminder to show up on our bodies, like a cute Moroni tattoo? It just magically appears somewhere on your ankle or shoulder blade... or a nice CTR...

s--max said...

Oh, don't even get me started!!!
You look awesome though. & Way to go for the 5K. You rock!

Mel said...

A Halloween 5K sounds fun! You're probably more ready than you think. Good luck!

Robin said...

NOT Fair is right! Those silly husbands of ours and their non fat bodies make me sick! And a little horny. Anyway, you are awesome for being so diligent and if you ever posted any pictures of yourself, I might be able to say that you look great. I know you do.

Thoroughly Mormon Millie said...

Hey, come on, did you just post your results from the Napoleon quiz and then take 'em off???

I was going to say, I think Lafawnduh is the most functional person on that movie (her love for Kip notwithstanding). So you did good. :)

LOL, those quizzes are so funny. I love 'em.

Tori :) said...

As you wish Millie. I have re-posted it. :) (I had to resize it to make it fit right, that's why I deleted it.)