Thursday, May 10, 2007

Muffin Report



Gingerbread Man: All right. Do you know... the muffin man?
Lord Farquaad: The muffin man?
Gingerbread Man: The muffin man.
Lord Farquaad: Yes, I know the muffin man. Who lives on Drury Lane?
Gingerbread Man: Well, she's married to the muffin man...
Lord Farquaad: The muffin man?
Gingerbread Man: THE MUFFIN MAN!!
Lord Farquaad: She's married to the muffin man...

(Shrek)

I wish I was married to the muffin man. Then I'd look HAWT!!! But Alas, I am married to Jack Sprat. Today's muffin report is quite boring. I haven't lost any more weight and my workout "routine" has been anything but... On Monday I walked around in my workout clothes all day but kept getting sidetracked. I did eventually play a few games of "Elimination" (basketball) outside with the kids. And I did win. ;) Tuesday... nada. (I don't remember why I didn't work out?!?) Wednesday I ran 2 1/2 miles on the treadmill, did 50 push up and about 150 crunches. I'm. just. not. feelin'. it.!! I don't have any real motivation!

But there is hope... Sei's family reunion is on July 14. This year they are having a BIGGEST LOSER competition, much like Suzanne's family. But we don't have to lose the most weight or reach a goal weight. We have to take a picture of ourselves attempting to fit into a pair of jeans or whatever. Then at the reunion we have to try on those jeans!! AAAGGGHHHH!!! So, that's my motivation. I told them I want to fit into my size 4s. I would love to show up and fit into the jeans I went on my 1st date with Sei in- a size 2. But that is SO not gonna happen. I can get them on, and kinda buttoned if I don't breathe. But I look like someone Sei has booked into jail in the past... You can see like every butt dimple and the muffin... ooohh, the muffin. ;) (WHITE TRASH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

I just don't think dropping from a 6 to a 4 is very exciting. Plus, my butt isn't near as big as most of the people in his family. They all think I'm "little," so I doubt I'll win just because I didn't start out fat enough! Sei said they should make the contest "Who can get Tori's jeans over their knee??" Hee hee. I'm not saying I'm skinny, but I do have less weight to lose than most of them. So, anyway... those jeans are my goal. I have 2 months. But I don't want to just get them on, I want to fit in them even after they have been in the dryer!! Now THAT is a goal!

The contest officially starts on Monday, May 14. That's a good date since my birthday is tomorrow, Mother's Day is Sunday... I get a few more days to be piggy. Oh- what is the prize you ask??? Everyone participating is putting in $20. So, you win the pot and you don't have to give anyone a massage. I am SO not massaging anyone's anything, so... that alone should motivate me. I'll keep ya posted.

"You're a monster!... Not the gumdrop buttons!!!!!!!!!!"

(Sorry- I'd been thinking that since I put the Shrek quote at the top.)

15 comments:

canary said...

Your blog is very interesting!
Bye bye

txmommy said...

good luck with the jeans!

Toni said...

Um Tori... You are little!!

If you turn sideways, and disappear- you're little!

If your striped shirt has only one stripe- you're little!

If you have to run around in the shower to get wet- you're little!

s--max said...

Okay ~ I'd give anything to fit into a size 6!!! You may not discuss weight anymore. j/k That's great that you have something that motivates you. I have absolutely zero motivation to do anything. I'm trying to get Micah to come to the dark side w/us fat people, but he won't. He's so disciplined. Makes me sick. No, I'm not bitter. ;)

Lauren said...

You will reach your goal...because you are cool like that. Now onto the shrek quote: my brother thinks that I have a voice like the gingerbread man. He tells everyone he meets and they all agree. this makes me sad.

Stepherz said...

Dude, I haven't seen a size 6 since I was, ummm, 16. Lucky you!

I think that the prize makes it totally worth participating. But you are right, they probably won't give you as much props as they will someone who is really large. I've also learned recently that overweight people will actually lose more weight with less work because, actually I don't remember the scientific explanation for that, but they apparently lose weight faster and easier than us thinner folk. Which is great for motivating them, but bad for motivating us. Anyway, sometimes I talk too much. Shut up, Steph. I'm a diligent commenter, but sometimes I ramble.

Good luck with your contest, Tori! Keep us posted!

Suzanne said...

Good luck getting into your jeans! I've been losing weight, but I still have a muffin! :( Good thing I have 6 more weeks until our competition is over! :)

Thoroughly Mormon Millie said...

LOL @ Canary's comment...

We love "You're a monster!" at our house. Good stuff. :)

utmommy said...

Size 6??? What's that???

I SO want to lose weight. I've got to do it!

I think I can... I think I can... I think I can...

Mel said...

Way to get motivated! However, I really don't think you need to lose weight. I guess us women are just never satisfied:)

Amanda said...

Good luck with your weight loss goal!!
I would love to get into a size 6 again. Right now I'd be happy to wear a size 8 comfortably.

Robin said...

That is by far the best part of Shrek, I could watch it over and over. I will never be a size 6 and would be thrilled to be a size 8. So what I'm trying to say is Shut Up you skinny mother of like 12 kids! You look fabulous.

Heffalump said...

Happy Birthday tomorrow!

tara said...

and i was never a size 4, but I am tall(er) so perhaps thats why.

I hope no one in his family reads your blog! Or that they're really cool and have a good sense of humor!

And happy birfday! Mine is also this month and David is working, on mothers day and the day after my birthday (which is when we would've done something since my bdays on friday) I'm not bitter or anything (o:

wendy said...

I love the vision of those skin tight pants. One of my sister in laws (A) always wears the tightest 80's jeans ever - so whenever I put on jeans that look a little snug, I have to ask my husband if I'm lookin' like A.