Thursday, January 28, 2010

Tad award with a capital "T"

tadOk, so... It's time for a Tad Award. BIG TIME. As y'all know I have babysat multiple children in my home for the last 2 years. Sometimes I really enjoyed it and other times, as it is with parenting, I was going crazy.  Last year was a tough year with all the court cases and I really battled some with depression. I felt a little isolated because I was always at home with little kids. I think any stay at home mom feels that way at times. Even not stay at home moms feel that way I'm sure. So anyway... I gave my notice to the 2 moms I babysit for. I gave them SEVEN weeks notice because I honestly wanted them to be able to find someone they trust and feel comfortable leaving their child with. I thought 7 weeks was plenty and I also thought the letter I wrote explained my feelings - I admitted I was a bit burnt out and that I wanted to be able to spend more time with Liv before she starts school.  I also told them that with how I felt I knew I couldn't be the best caregiver. I thought honesty would be best.

Well, then Alec got sick. He was diagnosed on Saturday with strep AND mono. He's been out of school all week and basically doesn't leave the couch. He's on Omnicef and steroids. We had to take him back to the dr. today to get an antibiotic shot and a steroid shot. He's so miserable. So, obviously I couldn't be watching kids with Alec so sick and so contagious. I let the moms know.  One mom was awesome. She's been awesome the entire time I've watched her kid. She always paid right on time. She was very easy going when I had to take a day off or had an appointment so someone else watched her daughter, etc...  She now has her daughter staying with a friend I recommended.

The other mom... not so awesome. She has lied to me and used me. She has asked me to not cash her checks until like 5 days after she paid me, text me at 6am to tell me she's bringing her son early,  etc... And I was always accommodating to her because I felt bad since she went thru a divorce in the last year. Plus, I love her son. I've watched him since he was 3 months old- he turned 2 in Dec. Well, apparently my notice pissed her off. I kind of expected it since she told me before that she wanted me to watch him until he went to kindergarten. I never said that would happen since he's 2 years younger than Liv. But anyway... I thought with 7 weeks notice she wouldn't be as mad. She had to leave her son with her dad all this week and today I get an email from her. I won't post the whole email here, but these are a few parts (names have been changed):

What bothered me most about your letter was that you said you’ve been feeling burned out for a month or so.  The way you worded it came across to me as you had been discussing this with R*** since you gave me her letter by mistake.  If you felt that way, I wish you would have mentioned this sooner.  I don’t want "Billy" somewhere he is not wanted or somewhere where he is being neglected because you are stressed out.  I don’t mean to sound tacky to you in regards to this at all.  I’m just saying, it concerns me. (For the record I told her in OCTOBER I was feeling a little burnt out.)

"Billy" has been staying with my dad and the difference in his attitude and overall behavior and happiness is amazing this week.  He’s been in the best mood I have ever seen him in.  That tells me a few things.  Either you are correct and he has not been getting the attention he needs and/or he’s not happy there.

Um, ok. How am I suppose to interpret that? It really hurt my feelings when I read it. And I kinda went off on her. Not as much as I wanted to because really I don't like to be mean. But whatever. She got my email and said that I was SO MEAN and that she's glad she found that out now. Puh-lease. I've taken great care of her child for 2 years and one email response after she attacked me means I'm "mean"??? She said she wasn't disrespectful to me at all. Um???  She even had the nerve to say "I’m pretty sure that’s not the way your God would want you to treat people.  I have never insulted you in such a way."
WTH? I wasn't even "mean" but I did throw a few shots in- but they were totally true. She was just hateful because she's mad she didn't get her way.  Her ex-husband was mortified by how she treated me and called me apologizing profusely. I was really upset- crying upset. I don't like to be mean. I don't like to hurt others feelings. I am a very nice person. But man, I don't like to feel used or attacked.

So, that's it. She and other mean, selfish people get a TAD award. Unfortunately it doesn't make me feel any better to give it out. :(